Monday, 25 June 2007

Heatwave? What heatwave?


Well, since you asked Buggsy, I am f... hot! (and I don't mean "fairly").
It's the topic of the day! There's a heat wave going on, and all of the sudden, all other issues have disappeared from people's thoughts. Our sole concern these days is whether it is 43 degrees in the sun or in the shade! Big difference if you ask me! I feel as if I am melting away! (Just a note for our newscasters. I spent the best part of my life in Africa, and unless you are referring to the desert-but even there, temperatures drop at night- please avoid using the term "African temperatures" to characterise this heatwave, because you are WRONG!)
Putting a positive perspective on it, all this heat and perspiration is working wonders with my physique. At this rate, when I hit the beach, I will be totally fat free and proudly displaying my six pack (no! not the beers)!
I don't care about all the complaints I hear on the media, I don't care whether we are breaking twenty year old records here. No! This is a sign from Him, that I should bite my lip for a few days, and at the end I will have something to show for it.
This is the kinda weather that suits Greece, anyway!
It makes it official for people to skive off work and hit the beach. Even public sector workers have a good excuse for not working efficiently.
It is a good excuse for the Electricity company to put all the blame for years of neglect to scorching temperatures damaging the grid.
It's a good opportunity for taxi drivers to charge extra for turning the air conditioning on.
The Water company raised rates a couple of months ago, and all of us were complaining. Little did we know that they had a look in their crystal balls, and saw this coming. We should be grateful, because this kind of foresight simply didn't exist a few years back. The country is actually progressing!
If only we could convince everyone on the benefits of using a deodorant, perhaps our public transport system could prove useful, too.
Heck! Thinking about it this heatwave is a blessing!

10 comments:

David said...

Ah, heatwaves. I remember those from my New York City days. Nothing worse than riding on a subway car with a busted AC on a 100(f) degree afternoon! I'm sending you some cool vibes and icy thoughts.

In all fairness to Greece I know of a few American chicks who have been round that way and they were quite pleased with how you guys represent the male gender; deodorant or not! ;)

Stay cool bro!

Epimenides said...

Well, we have to be good at something David! ;)

JYankee said...

Oh... there's not the so called heat wave over here... and summers don't get QUITE as hot... but blend it in with the humidity and it's nearly as bad! Hey you stud you.... when are the photos being posted??? Betcha look like that Matthew McConnely??? What's his face that's been on People mag for awhile for best abs..

Random Magus said...

It becomes a way of life for us in summers in Dubai when temperature reaches up to 52-52 degree Celsius :(

Epimenides said...

jyankee - for the time being I keep my six pack in a bag :0

rm - At least you have the open spaces for air to circulate. We are a concrete nightmare! :(

Michelle said...

oh yeah.. cool African nights. My husband was shocked to find he had to put on a sweater in the evenings in summer in Africa.

Here in Scotland it's often warmer at night than during the day. I still find that weird.

Epimenides said...

Oh yes Michelle! Cool African nights! I remember them... :)

rp said...

Amen on the deodorant comment. On NYC subways, WOW!!! Some folks STINK! And we only get to about 37 C on a bad day (though subway tunnels are much hotter). Didn't realize it got so hot in Greece. I know it does in India, but wow, that's bad.

Epimenides said...

rp - It does get pretty hot in Greece in the summer, which coupled with the fact that there's hardly any green in the cities, it makes the atmosphere choking!

rp said...

NY is like that, too, The Concrete Jungle. I thank God daily for Central Park. Without it, the city would be absolutely unlivable. I really do believe it keeps New Yorkers human!